Yep, the above picture is of me with my hair down. Not something you see a lot of.
So people ask me how I do my hair a lot. I don't know why, they just do. Half the time when I tell them, they just look at me and go "Noooooo!" as if I just lied to them in a vain effort to keep the real truth of my hair secrets forever a mystery from their mortal minds.
I got the idea for my hair from a few different places, the lead singer of Information Society, Robert Smith of The Cure, some guy I saw at an amusement park when I was still normal looking, and good old experimentation.
For the record, here is how it is done...
After I get out of the shower, I towel dry it and I blow dry it.
After it is dry, I use a crimping iron, one of those funky irons they used on hair in the 1980's to give it that kinky Madonna look. The Crimper causes the hair to have more volume, kind of like an afro.
From there I use hairspray. Everyone thinks I use some whacked out concoction like egg whites, glue, or some other funky arcane compound. For the record, it is Rave #4 hairspray, and it works WAY better than eggs. First of all, eggs smell AWFUL when you hit them with a blow dryer. Second, come on, think of how hard it would be to put eggs in your hair. Good old hairspray does the job, and is way easier than anything else, including hair gel or mousse.
I pull my hair out straight, spray it a few times, and use a blow dryer to dry the spray and keep it up
In all it takes me about 45 minutes, sometimes less, sometimes more.
I don't use that much hairspray. Less than 2 ounces a day. I do however go through about 4 to 6 blow dryers a year, so I buy the very cheapest ones available, $12 at Sally Beauty Supply.
Someone asked me if I would be bothered if someone else had my hair cut. Honestly no. In fact I have seen two people at clubs who saw me one week and the very next week had the EXACT same hair cut. One was a girl, and not only did she seem to really have a knack for doing it better than I did, but it looked better on her as well. I was very pleased that someone liked something I did so much that they did it themselves.
Funny story: One day I was heading out of the hardware store with some tools and this older kind of cow boy type compliments me on my hair. We start to talking and he is asking me the normal questions, how I do it, does my work mind it that way (No, they don't. As long as I am wearing pants my job figures I am ok. Yes I do work for a corporation, but they are very lenient) just kind of small talk.
Then, he lowers his voice...and says "Man, I have to know..." and looks around very conspiratorially, leans forward and as though he was asking me for the missile launch codes for a nuclear attack, and completely seriously and without a hint of sarcasm "How does it work when you are eating pussy?"
Under normal circumstances that would have been a pretty retarded question, but I just could not help but laugh, pretty much due to the fact that he asked me as though it was not some lecherous guy's comment, but an absolutely VITAL piece of information that he personally had to know.
I told him that I pretty much can hold my own in that department. Wait...that could be taken the wrong way...